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A scuppering allegory Reply to this Post
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A shipwrecked mate walks along the shore and claps eyes on a fine wench, though she be missin' her arms and legs.
"Excuse me, sir," she pipes up, "I've been here on this little island fer so, so long. And in all this time, I've ne'er been kissed. Would ye do me the honour?"
And a fine mate he is too, fer he bends down 'n gives her the type o' kiss that would shiver her timbers.
"Oh, thank ye, greatly!"
"My pleasure. Fair winds!"
"See ye!"

The next day, he walks by again, and there she is again, fer where else would she be?
"Oh 'tis me most favourite sailor o' the seven seas. Ye made me so happy yesterday, but I've also never been hugged. Tis hard with no arms."
"Is that right?"
"Aye. Please do this thing fer me..."
He hopes this isn't to be a habit, but he bends down, puts his briny arms around her torso and squeezes her like he's found an over-spillin' chest, so to speak.
"Ooh, thank ye again, that we're lovely." He nods and off he wanders along the beach.

The next day arrives, and they once again meet.
"I've one more thing to ask..." says she, "though maybe I'm chancin' me luck now." The pirate bends down and put his ear to her mouth.
"I've never been scuppered."
And with that he picks her up and tosses her into the sea. "Now ye're scuppered!"
Now on Obsidian!
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