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Print at Apr 10, 2020 11:44:54 AM

Posted by Stolencause at Jul 14, 2008 7:42:32 PM
Re: YPP's Greatest Hits! - Entry Thread (Deadline July 20th)
Pirate name: Stolencause
Ocean: Hunter
Name of original event: Bah Lovebug!
Link to the original event thread: Here.
Contest-specific information: 1500 word limit.

An Epic Tale of Passion and Other Such Nonsense

Imhatin Thisaday walked down the dirty path leading to the local tailor. He kicked a rock as he walked, keeping his eyes fixed upon the ground, ignoring cries of "Happy Valentine's Day!" and frowning at young couples happily holding hands. Walking at a brisk pace to quickly reach his destination, he avoided talking to anyone. Finally the tailor's shop came into view. A little boy was sitting on the steps holding a rose, slowly picking of petals and muttering "She loves me, she loves me not. She loves me....." The lad was so preoccupied with picking away the flower petals, he did not bother to look up as Imhatin walked by. Suddenly, an idea sprang into Imahtin's evil little mind. He checked to see that the boy was still preoccupied, and then climbed over the railing of the tailor shop stairs. He crept through the flowers growing around the shop (making sure to tread on the awful pink ones) and snuck up behind the little child. The little boy was still peeling petals away from the rose. Imhatin grinned. How could he ask for a more perfect situation? Suddenly, Imhatin jumped out of the bushes and yelled at the top of his lungs "SHE HATES YOU!" The poor little boy jumped, and then ran off, screaming and crying. Chuckling to himself, Imhatin strode into the shop, a spring in his step. The shopkeeper, and elderly woman, looked up from her sewing. "What can I do for you dear?" she said in a soft voice. Imhatin promptly emptied a sack of ripped clothing onto the counter. "Mend it! And do it quickly, ye old bag." he demanded. He threw a few pieces of eight at the woman, and exited the store, slamming the door as hard as he could as he did so. Smirking, Imhatin began walking back to his house. As he walked, he went over all of the things that he hated about Valentine's Day: the love, the flowers, the pink, and the chocolates. ESPECIALLY the chocolates.

In a few minutes, Imhatin was back at his little shack by the ocean. As he stomped through the sand and tangled seaweed, he noticed a little boy, chasing the water as it went back into the ocean, and then dashing the other way, screaming and laughing as the waves licked his heels. Imhatin sat upon his sighed deeply. This boy completely destroyed the panorama that was his front yard. "Scat, ye pesky lad!" bellowed Imhatin. But to Imhatin's surprise, the boy did not run away. He walked up to Imhatin and sat in a chair next to him. It was then Imhatin noticed that the boy was the one he had scared out of his wits earlier! Squinting up into Imahtin's eyes, the little boy said "Mister, why are you such a meanie?" Imhatin was surprised. He had never heard one so little speak with such bluntness. "I hate Valentine's Day." he replied quietly. The boy continued to pester him. "But why do you hate it? I love it! There are pretty flowers, and everyone's happy, and there's candy and chocolate!" Imhatin sighed. Even his cold heart could not withstand the pure power of an honest, unmolded child.

"Well, it was a long time ago. I was engaged to a beautiful lass by the name of Maki Nthegoodcandi. She owned a chocolate factory, the best in the world, and I was a simple sailor for the navy. But we loved each other, and that was all that mattered. I still remember what happened on that one fateful Valentine's Day that split us up. I was hard at work on my boat, the Fearful Marlin when I saw them; skeleton raiders from the far north. Now it is common knowledge that skeleton raiders LOVE chocolate. At once I knew that I had to get back to my beloved Maki, for she was in grave danger. My only option was to jump off of the ship and start swimming, and it was lucky I did, because a second later a cannon ball hit the ship and sunk it. By the time I got back, it was too late. The shop was stripped of all chocolate, and my sweet, sweet Maki was gone." Imhatin finished the story, and looked into the little boy's eyes. He had seen those eyes somewhere before. Then he noticed something even more strange. The little boy was smiling. He was wearing a wide grin that seemed like it filled his whole face. "Why are ye smiling, lad? I would think a little lad like yourself would be a bit sad after a tale like that one." said Imhatin. And that little boy replied "I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Imhatin. My mom says the name reminds her of my father, a brave man, who's ship was sunk in the defense of the island where she lived."

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